John Lennon Killed Sharon Tate

Millions of people have been killed in the name of religion, especially Jesus, so He must be guilty of the murders. I mean, right? John Lennon wrote a song, and Charlie Manson scrawled the lyrics on the wall in the victims' blood, therefore John Lennon is guilty of the crime. Right? Obviously.  The most important … Continue reading John Lennon Killed Sharon Tate

Advertisements

When It Rains It Snows

"You only get 3 great women in your life.  They come around every 10 years or so.  I had all mine at the age of 16.  Whatcha gonna do?" states Chazz Palminteri's character in A Bronx Tale, and a funny scene it is.  He's talking to the kid, trying to give him good advice.  If … Continue reading When It Rains It Snows

Fun is a Phallic Symbol, Part 2 (Nirvana Leads To Hell)

In Darren Aronofsky's The Wrestler, Randy "The Ram" Robinson says something along the lines of, "the eighties ruled, man, until that pussy Cobain came along."  He's drinking at a strip club, his glory days behind him.  Marisa Tomei pole-dances in agreement.  The new angst trip is a drag.  Not even punk is any fun anymore.  … Continue reading Fun is a Phallic Symbol, Part 2 (Nirvana Leads To Hell)

The Short, Simplistic Reason Music Sucks Today That Even Your Dog Can Understand

You get what you pay for.  When you take everything for free, the only people who can afford to survive are those who are ARTIFICIALLY PROPPED UP.  "Supporting your local band" is good, but not enough.  Most of those bands are comprised of dilettantes, and your support is wasted on them.  Let them be discouraged … Continue reading The Short, Simplistic Reason Music Sucks Today That Even Your Dog Can Understand

There Is No Such Thing As A Diverse Group Of People

The most diverse group capable of being assembled would be comprised entirely of individuals, different people who don't "identify" with anything, least of all a group label. By manufacturing a group, sub-group, side-group, or super-group, herding the individuals you want to control into these groups, and then conditioning the individuals to "identify" with this or … Continue reading There Is No Such Thing As A Diverse Group Of People

The Chrome Nun Takes Off Her Burka

“Through literacy you can begin to see the universe. Through music, you can reach anybody. Between the two, there is you, unstoppable.”  Grace Slick Grace Slick rocks.  More than merely having a great singing voice, she's also a snarky (but repentant) drunk, dresses like a sexy psychedelic nun on American Bandstand, makes impressive paintings with … Continue reading The Chrome Nun Takes Off Her Burka

Repel The Muslim Hordes With Healing

  Nobody with any self-respect or human sympathy is truly concerned about the feelings of the clitoris-cutting, acid-throwing, honor-killing, fag-tossing Muslim invaders of the West, aided and abetted by estrogentrified politicians and brainwashed, self-hating leftists and fake feminists. For the rest of us, I believe I have a solution to the problem.  Put this band … Continue reading Repel The Muslim Hordes With Healing

Going Soon In Aztlan (The Best English Lyrics Are Translations of Spanish Lyrics)

When I went to Europe in 1994, I befriended two French girls in Berlin who spoke terrible English.  We met at the hostel, "became friends," and went out and got drunk and had fun in the mutually-foreign and completely indecipherable street layout of Berlin.  We got so lost we asked a cop for directions; he … Continue reading Going Soon In Aztlan (The Best English Lyrics Are Translations of Spanish Lyrics)

Not a Review of a Movie I’m Never Going To See

It's debatable what tends to be the first thing to go when a fascist regime takes control.  The dissenters, the thinkers, the arts?  A combination of all three?  The answer is yes.  And yes and yes and yes. The only question is whether the fascist regime is using political means, cultural means, or both.  When … Continue reading Not a Review of a Movie I’m Never Going To See

The Punk-Rock Soccer Matriarchy (and how to avoid it)

Before I was voided out of Twitter for reasons of not giving them my phone number, I was a follower of Ben Weasel from Screeching Weasel (@screechingweez), not because I'm a fan (I'm happily indifferent), but because he stands firmly opposed to censorship and fascism in all its forms.  Which makes him oddly anathema to … Continue reading The Punk-Rock Soccer Matriarchy (and how to avoid it)

Art Worshipers & Artistic Legalists

Sometime in the last couple of years, I was politely accosted during a show in Flagstaff by an artistic legalist. An artistic legalist is somebody who lacks imagination, is adamantine in his legalistic religious beliefs about art, and imposes this oxymoronically-unyielding void on everyone around him.  Artistic legalists aren't art worshipers, necessarily.  An art worshiper … Continue reading Art Worshipers & Artistic Legalists

American Parthenon

Touring the drive-in ruins of modern America, greaser ghost & bellhop, bungalows in the sand   Sad diner broken windows, fast-food parthenons to go           4 September 2014 Amboy, California From the upcoming book Slipping Toward The Drip-Dream Due in 2018

Letter To The Jerome Town Council

3 February 2015 Dear Jerome, I wanted to take this opportunity to clarify the position of permit-free performance in Jerome. The committee meetings, unfortunately, bore no fruit. The first meeting was extremely productive, everybody leaving with an optimistic, win/win attitude. Abe Stewart mentioned the possibility of ignoring the busking issue entirely, and focusing on simply … Continue reading Letter To The Jerome Town Council

Response to James Hetfield’s Napster comments from Joe Rogan’s podcast #887

He is absolutely correct.  It's the reason there are no major artists today.  I mean real, legitimate artists who have an organic career.  Who's big?  Eminem who has been in the public eye for 20 years?  He has a new song, well great.  What about NOW?  Who's new?  And GOOD.  Who raises the bar?  Who … Continue reading Response to James Hetfield’s Napster comments from Joe Rogan’s podcast #887

Seeds of Heaven

I can't resist posting this picture, of the absurdly-idealized vision of van life from fellow moon-denizen Spacemind, who clearly lives INDOORS, judging by the absolute lack of neurosis, exquisite attention to detail, and totally-unrealistic depiction of van life in this painting below.  I want to see the puffed-up cops asking for your "adventure pass," or the tweeker lunatics throwing … Continue reading Seeds of Heaven